Personal Power - Negotiation

November 1, 2011

Interview with Dan Roam, author of the book Blah Blah Blah: What To Do When Words Don't Work

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Mike Carruthers:
When we’re talking with people socially or professionally our ideas and the stories we tell are simply a string of words.

Dan Roam:
The problem is that unless those ideas are really, really crystal clearly formed they’re just kind of like big fluffy clouds. We talk about this one for a moment and then it passes away and the next one comes along and we completely forget about the previous one.
 

September 20, 2011

Interview with Kerry Patterson, author of the book Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High

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Mike Carruthers:
Those heated arguments we have with people seldom lead to a lasting solution because very quickly the goal becomes to win the argument not find a solution. So maybe there's a better way.

Kerry Patterson:
We suggest that the idea here is not to win, not to get your way but to come to a common understanding.
 

September 19, 2011

Interview with Kerry Patterson, author of the book Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High

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Mike Carruthers:
You will occasionally have what you might call a crucial conversation which is…

Kerry Patterson:
One where opinions vary, the stakes are fairly high and when emotions start running strong and we start losing control of our temper.
 

August 22, 2011

Interview with Peter Guber, author of the book Tell to Win: Connect, Persuade, and Triumph with the Hidden Power of Story

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Mike Carruthers:
Trying to convince someone with facts and figures will never be as effective as using a story.

Peter Guber:
It’s the way we make sense of things, we’re narrative creatures we’re not digital creatures, we’re analog creatures. And our oral tradition, our ability to talk and communicate goes back 40 thousand years.
 

June 24, 2011

Interview with Robert Cialdini, author of the book Yes!: 50 Scientifically Proven Ways to Be Persuasive

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Mike Carruthers:
People are pretty predictable. And you can use that knowledge to persuade them. Take restaurants for example…

Robert Cialdini:
If they put on the menu, "This is our most popular item," it immediately becomes more popular.
 

February 28, 2011

Interview with Kevin Dutton, author of the book Split-Second Persuasion: The Ancient Art and New Science of Changing Minds

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Mike Carruthers:
How can you be more persuasive?

Kevin Dutton:
If you can make someone feel good when you’re trying to persuade them you’re going to have a darn sight better chance of pulling it off than if you make them feel lousy.
 

September 8, 2010

Interview with Chris St. Hilaire, author of the book 27 Powers of Persuasion: Simple Strategies to Seduce Audiences & Win Allies

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Mike Carruthers:
Being persuasive is a skill, which you can get better at by employing some interesting and effective techniques.

Chris St. Hilaire:
You know one thing I counsel people on is removing the “buts” from their sentences. When someone says I don’t disagree with you what’s the next word out of their mouth? But.
 

August 18, 2010

Interview with Dr. Mark Goulston, author of the book Get Out of Your Own Way at Work...And Help Others Do the Same: Conquer Self-Defeating Behavior on the Job

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Mike Carruthers:
Difficult people - you have to deal with them so you might as well get good at it.

Dr. Mark Goulston:
 The way difficult people get to you is, often they will charm you and then as you interact with them they kind of frustrate you, then they may anger you.
 

August 17, 2010

Interview with Dr. Mark Goulston, author of the book Get Out of Your Own Way at Work...And Help Others Do the Same: Conquer Self-Defeating Behavior on the Job

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Mike Carruthers:
To truly have influence over people you really need to understand the concept of "buy-in".

Dr. Mark Goulston:
"Buy-in" is the first step in motivating or persuading someone to do something. "Buy-in" is the difference between - "Tell me more" and "No thanks I've heard enough already."
 

March 4, 2010

Interview with Sally Hogshead, author of the book Fascinate: Your 7 Triggers to Persuasion and Captivation

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Mike Carruthers:
Why is it that we find some people more fascinating than others?

Sally Hogshead:
The reason why they’re more fascinating is because they have an ability to elicit what I call the fascination triggers. There are 7 fascination triggers.
 

Sally Hogshead, author of the book Fascinate…