Do You Have The "It" Factor?

 June 4, 2010

Interview with Mark Wiskup, author of the book The It Factor: Be the One People Like, Listen to, and Remember

Mike Carruthers:
Do you have the "it" factor?

Mark Wiskup:
The "it" factor is the rare ability to connect with anyone you meet for any reason - whether you know them for five seconds or whether you've known them for five years.

Mark Wiskup, author of the book The It Factor ...

When you first meet someone and you get that question, "What do you do?" you can either give your title at that moment or you can tell them who your customers are and how you help them. It's much easier just to say they're the Assistant Vice President of the Southwest region for whatever company. But to say, "My name is Mark Wiskup, I'm an accountant - let me tell you the type of clients I help, oh and then what do you do? Tell me about your clients." That takes more work.

We all know people who seem to be naturally good at this - does it come easily and naturally for some?

I say that's not true. I say they're thinking of the people they meet, they're trying to build a connection, they're working hard and they're doing more than just giving, "What's up with you? Nothing. What's up with you?" They are telling something significant about something that happened to them. And they're asking other people what's significant with them as well.

So, you can't just go to a party or event and just expect to connect with people.

But it's like going to the gym. If you go to the gym and just sit on the side and have a cigarette and a Twinkie watching people work out, you won't get any better. But if you work hard you'll always walk out feeling good. It's the same way after a cocktail party where you have worked hard to find out more about others.