Human Attachement - Part 2

January 4, 2011

Interview with Amir Levine, author of the book Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love

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Mike Carruthers:
The science and psychology of human attachment it’s really remarkable because we’re probably more dependent than we think.

Amir Levine:
We’re wired to be dependent on our partners that’s our biology, we can’t help that. But if the dependency is good then actually paradoxically we become more independent. Because we have that feeling of security and we can go out into the world and do more things.
 

Amir Levine, author of the book Attached, says being in a good relationship maybe more important than you realize.

So I think the most important thing is that understanding your partner’s wellbeing is your wellbeing and it’s not just a metaphor. Where like the connection is real in a most physiological level and if your partner’s upset invariably you will be upset - even if you don’t want to you’re connected. Basically your partner starts to control your autonomic nervous system. So they control your heart rate, your blood pressure, the way you sleep, the way you eat – things that you don’t have control over. So once you understand that you are that connected on a very physiological level you understand that you have to take care of each other.

And Amir says there’s been some interesting research that proves all this.

Studies have shown, actually if you have high blood pressure and you’re in a good relationship and you’re next to your partner your blood pressure will go down. People that have wounds if they’re in a good relationship their wounds will heal faster. We don’t have control over these events but our being next to our partner can make a difference.
 

To hear the complete unedited interview, click here