Something You Should Know about Language

How Others Influence Us

June 28, 2016


Interview with Jonah Berger, author of the book Invisible Influence




Mike Carruthers:
You may not think about it but your actions are influenced by other people in some very unusual and unique ways.  For example say you’re out having dinner with a group of people and you know what you’re going to order but your friend orders first.


Jonah Berger:
And they end up ordering the same entrée that you were thinking of getting and then it comes to you.  Do you pick the same thing or do you pick something different? Overwhelmingly people end up changing what they were going to pick because their friend choose it and it makes them less happy as a result.

Jonah Berger

How To Improve Your Self Image

June 22, 2016


Interview with Tim Wilson, author of the book Redirect: The Surprising New Science of Psychological Change




Mike Carruthers:
Who you are or rather who you think you are is really the result of stories you tell yourself.


Tim Wilson:
So if we want to change in some way we can do so by trying to edit those stories.

Tim Wilson

What's Wrong With the Way People Disagree?

June 21, 2016


Interview with James Hogan, author of the book I’m Right & You’re An Idiot




Mike Carruthers:
You’ve probably noticed how nasty the political conversation has gotten and the same is true of debates on almost any controversial issue. Why?


James Hogan:
I think one of the reasons is it’s more effective. One of the things Noam Chomsky said to me was if you can’t win an argument shriek, call people names.

James Hogan

Power Of Empathy

May 27, 2016


Interview with Dr. Daniel Siegel, author of the book The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind, Survive Everyday Parenting Struggles, and Help Your Family Thrive




Mike Carruthers:
Whenever you’re in the situation where someone else is upset and you need to calm them down, about the last thing you should say to them is to calm down.


Dr. Daniel Siegel:
I think the intention of calm down makes a lot of sense but the action to achieve it is often misplaced. In other words  if you say, “CALM DOWN, CALM DOWN, CALM DOWN” – that usually doesn’t get people to calm down.

Daniel Siegel, M.D.

Be More Convincing

May 26, 2016


Interview with Dan Roam, author of the book Blah Blah Blah: What To Do When Words Don't Work




Mike Carruthers:
When we’re talking with other people socially or professionally our ideas and the stories we tell are really just a string of words.


Dan Roam:
The problem is that unless those ideas are really, really crystal clearly formed they’re just kind of like big fluffy clouds. We talk about this one for a moment and then it passes away and the next one comes along and we completely forget about the previous one.

Dan Roam

Being More Likeable

May 5, 2016


Interview with Michelle Tillis Lederman, author of the book The 11 Laws of Likability: Relationship Networking . . . Because People Do Business with People They Like




Mike Carruthers:
If you want to be likeable to just about everyone smile.


Michelle Tillis Lederman:
A smile is universally understood, you can see a smile from almost 30 feet away. The smile immediately is disarming and opens up and invites somebody in.

MIchelle Tillis Lederman

How To Be A Good Conversationalist

April 7, 2016


Interview with Don Gabor, author of the book How To Start A Conversation And Make Friends




Mike Carruthers:
When you speak with people in an attempt to establish a relationship, it’s important to realize what people are looking for in a conversation.


Don Gabor:
#1 is they want your attention; they want to know that you are listening – this is a basic human desire.

Don Gabor

Understanding Body Language - Part 2

March 23, 2016


Interview with Joe Navarro, author of the book What Every BODY is Saying: An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Speed-Reading People




Mike Carruthers:
To some degree you already know how to read body language - every human being does.


Joe Navarro:
Our species assesses for danger first and then assesses for hierarchy second and then we look for other things like emotions and so forth.

Joe Navarro

Understanding Body Language

March 22, 2016


Interview with Joe Navarro, author of the book What Every BODY is Saying: An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Speed-Reading People




Mike Carruthers:
Body language, if you learn to read it, can tell you a lot about a person.


Joe Navarro:
Our bodies reflect what we think, what we feel, and what we intend.


Joe Navarro

Networking For Success

March 16, 2016


Interview with Ivan Misner, author of the book Avoiding The Networking Disconnect




Mike Carruthers:
Very often people go to conferences or networking events with the wrong mindset.


Ivan Misner:
First of all I think people use networking as the face-to-face cold calling opportunity. “Hi my names Ivan let’s do business”. And they go right into sales mode and I think that’s a huge mistake.

Ivan Misner

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