Transcripts


 

January 19, 2007:
Developing Friendships & Relationships
Interview with Steve Chandler, author of 50 Ways To Create Great Relationships


Mike Carruthers:
One reason we fail to connect with other people may be because we're trying so hard to impress them.

Steve Chandler:

In other words, what really makes people upset and frustrated in all their relationships is this drive to be exceptional. I have to not let you think that I am just an average person.

Steve Chandler, author of the book 50 Ways To Create Great Relationships...

But if we were willing to just sit back and say, "you know, I'm just an average person like you," then all of a sudden both sides relax. Somehow in our society we push so hard for our children to become exceptional and for us to always be exceptional. The downside of being exceptional is we become the exception and we become isolated, no one really wants to be with an exceptional person.

Steve believes that one thing that makes every relationship better is the element of surprise.

So if I want to thank you for something, what do you expect me to do-, - just say "thank you", and if that's what you expect, then I'm not surprising you. But, let's say you mention during our conversation that you have a son who really loved the Oklahoma football team, and I just happened to have an old pennant for Oklahoma. So I now send it and say "I thought your son might like this". Well, that's such a total surprise, that person will remember that for the rest of their lives. So anything that is not expected, that will make the relationship so much better.

At somethingyoushouldknow.net I'm Mike Carruthers and that's Something You Should Know.

 
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