Transcripts

If there's an intention that a person has to conceal some information that's vital to the relationship, there's dishonesty in that. Secrecy has an element of deception and dishonesty.

But that's different than privacy.

Privacy is simply the recognition that there's no requirement for me to reveal everything in my life, every detail in my life to you. And a certain amount of privacy not only is legitimate, but I think it's necessary and responsible.

So for example, if you're having a flirtatious relationship with someone at work and you're spending more time with that person and you don't tell your partner for fear for what they'll think, do, or say, that's secrecy.

We're not saying that you should never have friendships or relationships with people of the opposite sex, but what we are suggesting is that if you have it, and it's a secret, and you conceal that from you partner out of the fear of what they might think, or what might happen to the relationship, it's going to affect you, it's going to affect them, it's going to affect the relationship even if they don't find out about it. And more often than not people do find out, and then you've really got a mess to clean up.

At somethingyoushouldknow.net, I'm Mike Carruthers and that's Something You Should Know.