Mike Carruthers:
Many
marriages today are in trouble. But interestingly…
Dr. John
Jacobs:
More
often than not - and this is the tragedy of many divorces -
more often than not, it is embarrassingly and surprisingly little
that has to be done to turn a very bad marriage into a very
good marriage.
Psychiatrist
John Jacobs, author of the book All
You Need Is Love And Other Lies About Marriage.
And I
believe that this is because people who get married generally
really love each and generally really want their marriages to
work. And over time when they're disappointed, they behave often,
very badly. And it takes very little positive reinforcement
from a spouse for people to get their hope back.
So what's
the first step?
If your
spouse comes over to you and says, "Let's stop fighting.
I really love you. I know what you need in this marriage. I'm
gonna try my best to give it to you. If you're not getting what
you want let me know what I could do better." If you take
that attitude…"and I really appreciate you and I'm glad
I married you." If you start talking that way with your
spouse, it is remarkable how fast a marriage that looks like
it is going absolutely no where but downhill, can reverse itself.
For transcripts
and access to this complete interview, visit our website. somethingyoushouldknow.net.
I'm Mike Carruthers and that's Something You Should Know.
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Why married couples are less willing
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How you can unilaterally start to fix your marriage even
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How complacency can be death to a marriage.
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