Mike
Carruthers:
If there's something about yourself you want to fix chances
are there's a self-help book on the subject. Dr.
Paul Pearsall:
Diet books are the perfect example of failed self-help.
There are thousands of them yet we're still fat. Dr.
Paul Pearsall author of The
Last Self-Help Book You'll Ever Need… I'm
telling you right now, you'd probably be better off to eat a diet book. The fiber
is better for you than trying to follow the steps. Dr.
Pearsall is particularly concerned about marriage and relationship books, yet
often written by people who have failed at their own relationships and written
based on opinion not fact. There
is good data out there but nobody's paying much attention to it in terms of university
research on marriages that have been videotaped and studied and looked at what
it really takes to make a marriage work. And the number one thing that really
destroys a marriage is the feeling of selfish contempt, that is, you haven't met
my needs but it's not addressed in most self-help books. Before
we accept the advice of people who claim to be able to make our lives better,
Dr. Pearsall would just like us to ask,"How do you know this works?" Think
for example about the issue of grief counseling, now like vultures these grief
counselors come in to do grief work at every international tragedy yet there's
no evidence that grief counseling is helpful and there's some evidence that it's
detrimental. Some people need it, but most people are meant to grieve in their
own way. At
somethingyoushouldknow.net I'm
Mike Carruthers and that's Something You Should Know.
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are 23 more minutes! Here’s what All Access
Pass Members can hear:
With all these self-help books, why do
people consider themselves less happy?
Why most self-help relationship advice
doesn't work.
There is a lot of good data that never makes it into the self
help books.
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