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November
15, 2006:
Anger
Interview
with Dr. Les Carter, author of The
Anger Trap
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Mike
Carruthers:
Do you know people who always seem to be angry about something?
Dr. Les Carter:
One of the things that tends to be behind the scenes
with individuals who have chronic easy anger, is a yearning
to feel significant.
Dr. Les Carter,
author of the book The
Anger Trap...
And the more that yearning is powerful on the inside of the
personality, the more these individuals feel insulted when even
the slightest message comes toward them from someone else that
says "You're not significant." Somebody cuts in front
of you, and obviously they don't care about you. While a confident
and significant-feeling person thinks "Well, you know,
let 'em go," a very insecure person that's just dying to
feel significant thinks, "Why do people have to treat me
this way? I can't stand it!" And what we have to do is
we have to take our focus off of the external features there
and recognize, "You know whether individuals treat me significantly
or not, the fact is I have innate value."
And Dr. Carter
has another way to help control your anger...
Well, what I
encourage people to do is to be willing to let go of the illusion
that you can and should control people and circumstances. So
much of the misappropriated anger has to do with a wish to be
in control, when in fact we're not going to be able to be in
control; it's just not going to happen.
You can link
to Dr. Carter's website
from ours, somethingyoushouldknow.net,
. I'm Mike Carruthers and that's Something You Should Know.
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