Transcripts

Marriage coach Larry Bilotta, author of the free report How Couples Can Fulfill Each Others Needs...

So if you're going to be personally fulfilled you have to learn something. And one of the first things I want couples to learn is who are they, what are their strengths, how do they succeed. And then once we know each of their strengths and how they succeed, then we want to compare how the two of them have not supported their strengths. So one of the ways to predict the future of divorce is how much you don't understand each other's strengths. Because what happens in a really bad marriage is that two people start pointing out weaknesses, and failures and faults.

Larry says think about how often you criticize or find fault with your spouse or they with you.

And then the next question becomes, "Do you ever focus on each other's strengths? Do you ever talk about what's right about each other?" To the degree that that is disappearing you can start to take another month off of the time you want to stay married. So the more you're removing any positive compliment, any encouragement, any of that - the more you have none of that (that includes, by the way, dead silence when they just don't talk to each other) you're cutting months and months off the time before the divorce actually finally happens.

Tomorrow why contempt in a marriage is sure to kill it - I'm Mike Carruthers and that's Something You Should Know.